Tourist Sauce (Scotland Golf): Episode 9, Castle Stuart

“Randy, what’s the goal today?” Just to stay alive. Yeah okay. “Thanks for doing this.” Yeah, for sure. Alright so what’s the deal what are we doing here?
Hey so Neil here you guys may recognize me from season one in Australia maybe
not with the facial hair I was rocking on that season but if the guys asked me
to maybe say a few words and kind of kick things off from a different
perspective for this episode I think it’s Castle Stuart wherever that is I
was unable to attend I still work at Google the house that clicks built Uncle
Larry Uncle Sergei said no dice this time around I had some some clients to
drive R.O.A.S. for which is “Return on Ad-Spend”
but regardless I’ve been dealing with a lot of KIMO you may know FOMO “fear of
missing out” well I’m dealing with KIMO which is “knowing I missed out” and it’s
been it’s been a tough eight weeks but guys what is it you guys want me to read
something Castle Stuart is not a traditional links course Mark Parsinen doubled down on the success of Kingsbarns in
Fife and employed Gil Hanse to design the course which opened for play in 2009
with so much classic golf lining the coast of Scotland new developments are
often maligned by the locals this is not the case with Castle Stuart…so listen
we’re gonna go through this pretty much shot by shot at there’s probably a lot
of information on the golf course that you’d be looking for especially if
you’re planning a trip all of that is in the accompanying write-ups for each
episode there’s one for Castle Stuart it’s at that’s probably the best place to go if you want to learn more
about the course the fact that it’s four minutes from the airport and all this
other great knowledge I don’t really have any of that because I didn’t go on
the trip so you probably want to go read the write-ups if that’s what you’re
looking for let’s go launch em there’s some Barry Bag-tags walking into
the parking lot sweet shout out BMW…is the big guy sleeping? “What’s up man? Oh I’m so tired. “How many holes are we playing today?” 36. Allegedly. Nobody gets as Jebular as the Big Guy. Very low-energy. Uhh, we’re at Castle Stuart right now in the car park and then we’re going this afternoon to Nairn which should be a awesome day I just need like wake up. “How’s the body feeling?” Uh, just terrible. So deactivated. Shoulder’s holding up though which is good. “What’s particularly deactivated?” Just
like my whole like lower body legs back and everything it’s gone. “Surpassed it?” Surpassed it. “We don’t even know where it is.” I just wanna sleep for like eight hours and I feel like that’d be really good but that’s not an
option so we’re just gonna we’re gonna go launch em. “DJ, what are you doing?” I’m gonna I was really really really taken yesterday by a half set idea so I’m going to play just odds today I think. It’s it’s look if you’re familiar with Season 1 you’re familiar with the Party Panther and it’s two
kinds of errors as he likes to point out: decision errors, action errors. And I just
find myself making far too many decision errors on the golf course. If I can limit the amount of decisions I’m making as far the amount of options I
have I feel like that’s going to lead to to more consistent play and hopefully better score. Between Tron and DJ these guys try to break the game down to like a process-based thing and
I’m just gonna be honest with you like it sounds good but I just don’t think
these guys like have it dialed like that I don’t. “Randy, what’s the goal today?” Just to stay alive. I’d love to be in the one ball club as always that’s I’ll start there everything
else take care of itself “So we’re both going with nine clubs today?”
Well I’m going with eight but it’s all about doing more with less I think that’s that’s what No Laying Up is all about it is scrapping it together just just get it
done what do you have “We’re playing a Gil Hanse course” yeah I
love Gil like like Gil’s courses are almost all been awesome “Look, nobody loves Gil more than you” I’m trying to think if I’ve ever played a bad one, I love em. “What do you know about Gil Hanse?” I know Gil likes the Grateful Dead he also tends to post a lot of pictures on Instagram of Dave
Matthews so I kind of think Gil’s cool cuz I like Dave he seems to get
backstage passes I think he’s in deep with Dave “Bud, this must be what you feel
like all the time” Oh that’s right big people little world and it’s great rain gear from
Randy we got some extra inventory, we’re a small shop
check us out. “This place looks quite quite good. Alright this is the start of
the Highlands phase the Highlands Hustle the final what are we calling this
competition? The race to race to the Highlands- this has been the Race to the Highlands. The race to Dornoch this is the final stage presented by Dubai Duty Free. Fire away. It’s me? Oh yeah because we flip the tee, pay attention. Loves it? This is this is really where
traditionally in the Race to Dornoch they separate the wheat from the
chaff like when they, when they hit the Alps and the Tour de France the climbers
start bucking their heads Oh Randy Randy I would disagree with Tron there I say
the Big Guy’s more like Jan Ullrich he peddles a gear up
well I guess it’d be a gear down I’m not really a cyclist forget I said that I’m getting on the chicken today, boys Tron for eagle at the second Tron for birdie at two Two three-putts Here’s what I don’t understand–all these courses look like crap firm and fast you know what I like green courses okay can I just be honest about something for a second? I love it when it’s just really green like soggy overwash I think
the conditions look appalling personally “Are you being serious or is this a bit?” I don’t know yeah uh the viewers will have to decide for themselves. “That was with the drone too?” The rig is wrecked. I do like when the bunkers had like the
sod levels that’s very very appealing to the eyes and I would get absolutely
ejected with some of these runoff areas around the green there’s no doubt about
it Ah, the castle in the background is that
any good? See, I am a big medieval guy so I think
kids like grow up and they’re either like they’re into like dinosaurs
they’re into like cars and trucks I was a big knights and castle guy loved moats and I
loved draw bridges “You were kind of an Imperialist child?” Yeah a little bit I think yeah I’m a
feudal I’m very feudal so I don’t know if this castle had if Castle Stuart
has moats and drawbridges if it does and you guys didn’t show it that’s a
disgrace I’d also like to take this opportunity to call out Randy he loves
the like long sleeve over/under short sleeve look you know like classic
circa 2005 N.G. Schu 9th grade like heading to the party Peg’s dropping
me off in the Tahoe it’s it’s kind of a timeless look I don’t know if it’s a
good look but so they call that out “Is this a spot where normally you hit
3-wood?” This might be Driver all day…into the wind SICK! “Go in” “Good shot!” “What are you trying to do with this one?” Ninety-three yards, this is about a 88% percent 56-degree little dead arm shot. “oh no, that was like 97% I think” Things are moving quickly Okay God, this is so your speed. Hold on, I know I know I know listen listen listen here’s my thing I’m of two minds here I totally love what it’s all about
but like if you just carry the full set just in case you got all the clubs
available see I disagree like you’re so “I’m so worried that I didn’t choose
the correct club but I’m between there’s so much indecision involved just strip
away all that indecision and there’s no choice it’s like Soviet Russia man like
you have one option and you have no choice but to like it.” Soviet Russia didn’t work though. In Soviet Russia the club chooses you The thing is if you always have a backup you never are committed and you’re
always second guessing you’re always second-guessing. “Especially when you
stink.” Yeah which all of us do right oh sure
you guys may have talked me into the afternoon round. “Think about how much
more energy…I have so much more energy.” Is it a true half set or is it eight? I have eight but look it’s a personal
preference you do whatever you feel like Would you guys mind if I joined you this afternoon? Oh my god nothing would make me happier. “Randy, we’re just trying to make the tent bigger man…and taller too you know we’re gonna need to make some modifications to the tent.” I hope you have big enough tent poles. It’s like a Billy Graham tent too after a
while it’s gonna be like a revival this afternoon Will you guys dunk me in the water? “We gotta throw that GIF in” “Deej, were you between a three iron
and a three iron?” “He loves it” “Come on use it come on come on come on!” “Great shot!” Soly, noticeably silent about the dog bag did you play it? It’s gonna be a ‘No’ for
him, dawg. So indecision is not an issue for you? “It’s a huge issue for me.” But you’d rather have 14 clubs? “Without a doubt. I’m capable of making the right decision these guys have so little faith in themselves to make the right decision.” DJ, what do you have to say for yourself? “yeah, look, that’s the whole point of course.” “Oh look he’s more freed up already” God I love the Big Guy’s move it’s like a
it’s like a Gumby Furyk where it just drops it in the slot and you really don’t know
he’s playing roulette up there like he doesn’t really know where it’s gonna go
but it’s it’s nothing if not athletic I’ll say that. Here’s one of my big problems
with the half set and I don’t know where this kind of falls but I am a
disgraceful iron player so it makes me a little nervous…aren’t you gonna be a
disgraceful iron player either way? yeah you’re right you’re
right you’re right right Big Guy loves air travel “Talk me through this one a little bit”
uh, it’s kind of an in-betweener, I got 51…. Here we go, DJ’s gonna work the ball …it’s going to be a little chip 7-iron… I’m, I’m in-between, I’m going to play a little butter cut here and work the ball play the ground gameI do like you walking us through the shot though so guess what I’m gonna
keep talking over it like I’m Peter Jacobsen just so nobody can hear what’s
going on. That’s what I’m here for, right? Classic DJ at the end there with the pull down. “That was a that angle play you made back there.” Honestly this is not that bad of a lie that’s alright, a little chip and a putt A bit of a long putt…”Happy 4th
of JulyTron’s got the red white
and blue on, he’s playing the Truvis USA balls I don’t know how much they’re
gonna like you over here.” nothing says America like Callaway Japan God, is that view any good? Geez Also, is there anybody else playing these courses? Shouldn’t it be like the
high season? “Good shot” Camera crews have arrived now that
Randy’s making his moveI’ve already missed it, it’s a good par. “Explain the mental miss” Anything inside five feet you try to mentally
miss it as soon as possible like picturing it so then like paint the picture so then when I do stand over it I feel much more at ease
and it kind gets rid of that yip because I’ve already missed it you might as well get on with it and sometimes it goes in Oh god God, that’s bad A little nervy! It’s a great par Hate it, hate seeing it Just a great par It’s like a snuff film or something.
What do I see in it? “Yeah.” I see him get really de-cely He de-cels, it’s like he’s hitting the
brakes and the ball just flies right by you know? “Oh!” “Got it, yep!” “Ahhh” “Here’s Soly cleaning up for a bit of a birdie” “And there’s another one” You remember before, right, how many times do you have to see it? “Here’s the Big Guy for a jumbo, a net jumbo bird” “Another bird, God, he just keeps flagging it.” “And there it is, he’s done it!” “That’s two birdies out of three holes to start the back
nine for Big Randal.” Soly wearing blue what a surprise! I can visual-like, I’m like Matrix plugged in I can just visualize how this gonna go. “How is it gonna go? You gonna call your shot?” I’m gonna leave a 3-iron short left of
that bunker, I’m gonna have a f****** mega angle chip a little wedge or or seven iron up there and make a birdie “Is that how you’ve envisioned this
playing out?” Yeah that’s a bit left my intended target but…the guys it looks
like you guys are leaking a little bit of oil on this round like kind of getting a little loosey-goosey you know like maybe not as focused as you need to be I
mean we’ve all been there. “Randall!” No, it was a really good plan it’s just a
bit of an execution error…I missed the fairway by about 60 yards, which kind of then affected the second shot, but hey, onward… See, look at Tron’s head he looks up it’s
crazy god I mean it’s great contact and it’s
right right in the slot I just it’s all it’s amazing that he’s able to do that
yeah we got eight bets open down at the 17th I feel like we just both hit the same
shot I don’t really know where it ended up and there, there we have it, technically I think I’ll be giving Tron the line here. That was scummy backstopping there from both of you. “Randy, great play” “Tron!!!” First one of the trip, man “Net ace?”Net ace! “Nice putt” “Good stroke, Phil” “Really good” “Well done, Mr. Phil” Guys, that’s one of my best nines ever “What’d you fire?” Thirty-six “Come on!” I guess I was wrong about these guys losing energy. “TC for back to back birds” Back to back birds? Tom Emansky? And he’s on tilt? Icarito? “Tremendous finish” That was a twelve pointer, too, right? Hey guys, guys Hey, can we get rid of that line about me saying these guys are losing energy? “Yeah” That was a bad take. That was a, DJ, you hit some good shots down the stretch Great playing. Randy, good playing I think the best I’ve ever seen you play. DJ, good playing Great playing, congrats, that was awesome. You too, one under on the back? Really? I think so. “Alright, we’re wrapping up here at Castle Stuart, Randy, some people were calling that performance the best they’ve seen in
years.” Listen we’re over here in the United
Kingdom I just wanted to pay homage to Charles Dickens, kind of a tale of two nines…”47/36?” First nine was certainly one to forget but yeah back side you know got
on the chicken let it out of its coop was really riding it around there
free-range style and ended with a 36 you got to understand 36 is you know among
the best nine’s of my life and I don’t get to say this often but I legitimately left
about a 34 out there mister just like a I missed a two footer for birdie on 11 and 3 putted from about 40 feet on 15 I believe What a story arc there from Randy looking epically Jebby in the car to letting the chicken out of the coop I mean
that’s that’s transcendent stuff really but yeah I’m happy ready to go have a
proper pint. “Cheers.” Cheers. Also, the way you guys are packing these cars is an absolute disgrace it’s disgusting it really is it’s like how about you you
know take a minute to organize things instead of just stuffing it in willy-nilly “How’d the eight clubs go?” Hey look, I mean the results speak for themselves Would we have gone lower than 76 with a full set? I don’t think so. 76-76, the proof is in the pudding–order, order now order now to get your eight-club set form me and Tron That’s my third 76 of the trip Yeah, we had 76 Was it 76? 76, 76 “One more time, what’d you guys shoot?” 76 “Talk to me about Nairn” Nairnia “It’s a grower, yeah, let’s go with that” “Nairn playing just a bit firm” I wanted to join the eight-club group I am a disgrace “You stink” “Well, I was four under standing on the 13th tee I eagled the 15th hole and I shot 2 over par.” “Gentlemen, thank you for having us. Cheers!” “Alright, hey, thanks for the time” Yeah, hey, I’m happy to be here thank you, thank you, and thank you guys too, huh? You wanna play something to play us out? “Play us out? What does that even mean?” What does th–I don’t know

61 thoughts on “Tourist Sauce (Scotland Golf): Episode 9, Castle Stuart

  1. I was there in early August, played right after a 3-hour drive from the Edinburgh airport and it was glorious. Such a gorgeous course, and some legendary holes. Looking forward to this one

  2. Randy shooting "36" on the back nine after that yip on 11 is like the theory that Walter White actually died in that car in NH. And the rest of the finale was all a dream.

  3. If you want a tip dealing with short putts here is what works for me: hit it hard, take the break out and ram it in. I used to do the same thing where I would try to be to cute with it and miss it. Ram that fucker in the back of the cup

  4. I was a little worried about Neil’s commentary because he didn’t know the course but it turned out perfectly. A nice little break in the season. Well done!

  5. I think he was being serious, and I agree. Cause when I play something that looks like this in the states it is never a pleasant experience. Maybe if I get to experience it in Scotland my views will change.

  6. Not going to lie, I feel like you guys did not make enough of your trip to Scotland. You were all too tired or busy for most courses and I don’t think you got a good feel about how we actually play in Scotland.

  7. This trip is killing me, so jealous! Don't know the best part, Randy shooting 36, Neil commentating or Sully telling us about his back 9 at Nairn 😀

  8. Icarito Schuster merch is a must in 2019, ‘Wipey Fade’, ‘Bag Tag Barry’ and ‘Half Set Honchos’ also solid options

  9. as a scottish golfer they are great they as all golf courses should give local rates and scottish golfer rates and its a great set up. fantastic course this and very fair and all levels can play it as many tees

  10. You like castles ? Check out Dunstanburgh castle club and bamburgh castle courses or even better the Northumberland three castle challenge comp .. boom 🤗

  11. Nice choice of courses, I love Castle Stuart, but I must have played behind you guys before. no divot repair ? Must be used to caddies.

  12. FOR BIG RANDY… Putter grip more in the life line of the hands plus more upright, also (very important) Get that right less on the grip (right hand over active in the putting stroke) have the right hand over lapping the left hand, do not have right hand lower than the left hand, in a sense your taking the right hand out of the stroke. YIPS all gone!!!

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