Key & Peele – Slap-Ass: In Recovery – Uncensored


SLAP-ASS! SLAP-ASS!
SLAP-ASS! WHOO!
HEY, GARCIA. – GET HIM UP OUT OF HERE!
GET OUT OF THE LOCKER ROOM! YOU GET OUT OF THE LOCKER ROOM.
AHORA! – AHH, SLAP-ASS, SLAP-ASS,
SLAP-ASS, SLAP-ASS, SLAP-ASS. – WHOO.
– GOOD GAME, GUYS, WAY TO GO. – GOOD HIT, GARCIA. – HEY! OH, YOU DON’T–HEY, HEY,
HEY, HEY, KNOCK IT OFF. YOU CAN’T DO THAT.
GUYS, GUYS, GUYS. PLEASE KNOW, RAFI JUST GOT OUT OF TREATMENT,
REMEMBER? WE DON’T WANT TO TRIGGER HIM
WITH ANY SLAP-ASS. – HEY! WHAT THE FUCK
IS GOING ON HERE? WHY WE ALL ACTING
LIKE THE FUNERAL IN HERE? – NO, NOTHING, RAFI, HEH. YOU JUST CAUGHT US IN THE LULL
IN THE CONVERSATION, MAN. WE’RE HAPPY.
all: YEAH! – YAY!
– WE’RE HAPPY HERE. – I WAS A LITTLE AFRAID
FOR A SECOND, ‘CAUSE, I MEAN,
THAT WAS A GOOD GAME, HUH? GOOD GAME.
– YEAH, GOOD GAME. – ALL RIGHT.
HEY, GOOD GAME. GOOD GAME, MAN. GOOD GAME. OKAY. THERE’S AELEFANTEIN THE ROOM. YOU KNOW,
I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. SI, I HAD A PROBLEM. IT WAS BAD. AT MY LOWEST POINT, I WOULD SNEAK
INTO A HORSE’S STABLE. WHEN YOU FIND YOURSELF
AT 1:00 A.M. IN THE MORNING WITH YOUR HAND IN THE AIR AND A HORSE’S ASS IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE, THAT’S WHEN YOU KNOW IT’S BAD. – OH, RAFI. – BUT I’M OKAY NOW. I’M ALL BETTER, GUYS, HONESTLY. JUST TREAT ME
LIKE I’M NORMAL, OKAY? – OKAY, RAFI.
– LET’S HAVE SOME FUN. – OKAY, RAFI.
– IT’S A GAME. IT’S BASEBALL.
– HEY, ALL RIGHT. – HERE, HERE. – YOU FUCKING GUYS.
– IT’S A GOOD GAME. – GARCIA, YOU CAN PICK UP
YOUR GLOVE. [whispering]
COME ON, PICK UP YOUR GLOVE. [laughs] HEY, WHAT I TOLD YOU, HUH? IT’S JUST NORMAL, GUYS.
COME ON. YOU SEE, I’M FINE.
I’M ALL BETTER NOW. YOU GUYS CAN DO
THE NORMAL STUFF. BE YOURSELVES.
BEND THINGS OVER. PICK THINGS UP. YOU KNOW, DO YOUR STRETCHES. TOUCH YOUR TOES,
YOU STUPID FUCKERS. – [whistles]
EXCUSE, POR FAVOR. HOLA, AMIGOS. – HOLA.
– MY NAME IS RUBEN. I JUST CAME OVER
FROM THE BRAVES’ FARM TEAM. I’M FROM THE DOMINICAN REPUBLIC. – HEY.
– OH. – WE’RE ALL FROM
THE DOMINICAN REPUBLIC. – YEAH.
– I’M REALLY EXCITED TO BE WORKING
AND PLAYING WITH YOU ALL. GO, RHINOS.
all: GO, RHINOS. – ALL RIGHT.
– GO, RHINOS! – ALL RIGHT.
– WHOO. – THAT’S THE KIND OF SPIRIT
I LIKE TO SEE THERE, RUBEN. ALL RIGHT,
WELCOME TO THE SQUAD, MAN. – THANK YOU.
– IT’S GOOD TO SEE ANOTHER– – ALL RIGHT.
MUY BUENO. ALL RIGHT. – WE GONNA NEED A BIGGER BOAT. – WHOO. – OH, THEY, UH… REALLY PUT YOUR LOCKER
RIGHT NEXT TO MY LOCKER, HUH? – I GUESS SO. – YEAH, YEAH.
– YOU GOT THIS, MAN. – YOU’RE JUST
SPENDING AN AWFUL LOT OF TIME DOWN THERE, YOU KNOW? – HEY, I HAVE A LOT OF STUFF. – YEAH.
– A LOT. – I SEE THAT. – RAFI, YOU CAN DO THIS. – OH, MY GOODNESS. – YOU OKAY THERE, BUDDY? YOU’RE NOT LOOKING TOO GOOD. – I AM FEELING
A LITTLE BIT FLUSHED. – YOU KNOW,
I GOT A GOOD FEELING ABOUT YOU. MAYBE WE COULD BE GOOD FRIENDS,
MAYBE EVEN THE BEST OF FRIENDS. – MAYBE ANOTHER TIME. ANOTHER PLACE. BUT NOT HERE. NOT NOW. – WELL, EITHER WAY, WE’RE TEAMMATES, AND SO,
ANYTHING I CAN DO FOR YOU, ASK AWAY. – GOT IT.
– EH. – OKAY.
– GO, RHINOS! – OKAY.
– YEAH! UH! – OH, NO. NO, RAFI! – SLAP-ASS!
– RAFI, NO! – I WANT TO SLAP-ASS!
I WANT TO SLAP IT! – NO, YOU CANNOT PLAY SLAP-ASS.
– YES, I WANT TO SLAP IT. – YOU CANNOT PLAY SLAP-ASS. – YOU CAN’T
KEEP ME FROM SLAP-ASS. – YOU CANNOT HAVE THE SLAP-ASS.
– I NEED TO SLAP IT. – YOU CANNOT HAVE THE SLAP-ASS!
– YES, YES, I CAN HAVE IT. – NO SLAP-ASS.
NO SLAP-ASS. – YES, SLAP-ASS. – NO SLAP-ASS.
– SLAP-ASS– – NO SLAP-ASS. both: NO SLAP-ASS. – THAT’S WHAT I WANT TO HEAR. – I AM SO EXCITED. I AM SO EXCITED. – I KNOW IT’S A BIG ASS. – I’M SO, SO SCARED.
– I KNOW. I KNOW. I KNOW, I KNOW. IT WAS JUST TOO HARD TO RESIST. – OKAY. – ARE YOU OKAY? – I’M OKAY.
– OKAY. – HEY, GUYS. YOU KNOW MAYBE
AFTER A GAME VICTORY WE COULD ALL GO DANCING, RIGHT?
HUH? BOP, BA-BOP, BA-BOP,
BA-BOP, BA-BOP, BA-BOP. BA-BOP, BA-BOP, BA-BOP. [in slow motion]
BA-BOP, BA-BOP, BA-BOP, BA-BOP, BA-BOP, BA-BOP, BA-BOP, BA-BOP. – [in slow motion]
NO! – SLAP-ASS!

100 thoughts on “Key & Peele – Slap-Ass: In Recovery – Uncensored

  1. Subscribe to the new Key & Peele YouTube channel for all the classics as well as new-to-YouTube sketches: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdN4aXTrHAtfgbVG9HjBmxQ?sub_confirmation=1

  2. The amount of suspense in this skit is unbearable.

    Just like how unbearable it is for Peele to resist to slap ass.

  3. The lisp and the accent 😭😭😭🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

  4. I love key and peele, they are good comedians. It's good to know there are good black comedians like I thought there would be.

  5. I wish he had jumped between the hand and the ass and took the slap on his cheek to save his friend. Would have made an emotional ending.

  6. "When you find yourself at 1:00 AM in the morning, with your hand in the air, and a horse's ass in front of your face, that's when you know it's bad."

    Many people have suffered through this as well Rafi. You are not alone.

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